don’t tell me how to feel

today I get to land on flower petals

i plan to stay here for a moment

last night

i screamed

in a dream, or was it real?

the pain

watching and waiting

Loved ones disappear

unwelcomed

fragmented

the reality of hateful words

searing knives piercing through my loves known and unknown

my mixed race Family

it cuts me deep within my small

stand of resistance

i watch the wounds callus

i am so so small

a mother and wife and friend

so

don’t tell me how to feel

as I look toward the ground muddy

i see myself, this bit of earth and life

Formed and turned and formed

stretched and stretching

never forgetting how

How

hope springs up in every moment

a freakish thing I carry and witness

this thing of joy and hope

this unabashed love I hold and share from

don’t tell me how to feel

Not now, love, not today

today I choose to land on flower petals

remembering those that should be here too

i plan to stay here for a moment

share from it

can you

hold my hand,and I will hold yours?

i won’t tell you how to feel either

some things have no words